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Up until now, I blamed myself for a lot of stuff.

I thought that relationships hadn’t worked out because I wasn’t “good enough.”

I’d “hang out” with people who didn’t really hold their own selves in high regard.

I thought that when I was a kid, I somehow deserved being locked in a closet or being beaten.

Up until now, I thought I’d say all the wrong things, repeat stupid behavior problems, not be “right” enough.

Up until now, I had always thought I needed to look “perfect” to be accepted. I like myself NOW.

I thought that somehow I failed myself, and the people I loved.

What I’ve learned is that I had never set out to hurt anyone. I did the best I could with everything, and if there is anyone who feels I’ve hurt them, I will say with all of my heart that I am sorry.

Up until now, I cared too much about what other people thought about me, but I realize that was a weakness, and what I truly need to do is care more about myself.

I often thought that the number of friends or people interested were what defined value and importance. Now, I realize it’s HOW people care and if that’s only one person, and they care deeply, then you have everything in life.

Up until now, I tried too hard with many things, and it’s truly alright not to. It’s okay to let go and just be happy with my own existence.

Up until now, dumb things mattered to me, and they don’t anymore.

I don’t want to be a movie star, or famous, and I don’t need recognition beyond what society feels is right for me. I don’t need to live to meet anyone elses expectations.

Up until now, I’ve wasted a lot of time trying to be all things to all people. I’ve learned, that doesn’t work.

Up until now, I’d surround myself with people who didn’t deserve my attention, as they were only trying to use me for something.

Up until now, I cared about things too much, and now, I’m not willing to listen as much or do anything to control situations. What will be will be.

Today, I’ve learned a lot about what to do and not to do, and to be quietly satisfied with life, and its day to day, beautiful offerings.

 

 

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